#I got headcanons up the wazoo

[bloodypeachblog]

The Tumblr Yandere Quintet (Peter, Sunny Day Jack, John Doe, Damon, and Alan Orion) - my personal headcanons SFW + NSFW

(TW: blood, knives, death, cannibalism, anything associated with yanderes will most likely be here, so you've been warned)

A/N: btw they coexist in the same universe here. Like, let's say they all live together in a house with Y/N. Why? Because I can. Also this is all F!Reader, so yeah.

~♡~Peter~♡~

• He is shy boi when it comes to you. He acts confident, but underneath he is lowkey panicking.

• But towards others, he is brat. Just, burns and roasts up the wazoo. It's like the person flips the switch and activates his bitch mode.

• he loves playing video games, anything that seem interesting to him. He loves Dead by Daylight and his favorite role is the killer.

• True Crime Aficionado. He listens to podcasts, watches documentaries and movies and YouTube videos, he knows serial killers' stories like the back of his hand.

• he can cook and bake pretty well. He's not Gordon Ramsay levels of good, but he very rarely makes a bad dish. He likes to make food for you and watch your reactions to it.

• as a boyfriend, he is such a hopeless romantic. Roses, poems, serenades (he's not confident in his singing voice, so he plays songs that say whatever he's feeling and sends you the youtube link to listen to them, or just blaring them on the radio outside your window), the whole shebang. Of course, he's not obnoxious about it. Just enough to make you swoon.

• You guys know that old famous photo of a soldier kissing his girlfriend after WW2? Yeah, Peter loves doing that to you.

• pet names for you: Darling, Honey, Baby, Princess, Angel. Basic stuff.

♡NSFW♡

• he likes to nibble on your ear. He loves your reactions to it.

• guy is a straight-up pervert. He'd grope you when you're alone and make dirty jokes. You'd blush tomato red each time.

• angel on the streets, devil in the sheets. More like incubus in the sheets. He will find ways to make you moan his name.

• WHAT DAT TONGUE DO THO? OH LAWD Seriously, when he eats you out, you swear you can feel the very tip of his tongue brush against your cervix.

• favorite positions are missionary, mating press, and doggy style. But he likes oral too, both sides. He loves feeling your warm mouth taking in his cock, he struggles not to cum right then and there. He loves your taste, he can't get enough of it.

•some nights he can be gentle, other nights he'll fuck you into the dirt.

• his cock is about 5.6 inches, good thickness. Not the dick of the gods, but still something to brag about. Very pretty, too.

• Knifeplay? On you, depends on if you're into it or not. On him, FUCK YEAH. He fantasizes about you using a knife to write your name on his chest. Getting cut gives him the biggest hard-on, he'd be already dripping pre-cum. And if you lick the cuts? Oh, this man will cum immediately.

• Anal? Hell yeah. If you're okay with it, of course.

~~~~~

~♡~Damon~♡~

• He's more chill and laid back. Also he's emo. Because I said so.

• He likes listening to music. He likes any genre, but he tends to leans towards emo bands, stuff from Lapfox Trax, and metal. But you play a country song, he will destroy the radio or debate on murdering the artist.

• He wears his puffy coat almost 24/7. I say almost because he can't wear it in the shower. He loves to share it with you, the whole two person in one coat thing couples do.

• he's a cuddle bug, but won't admit it. If you tease him about it, he'll deny it and blush.

• he acts like a kuudere to others, if not annoyed. But when with you, he's so sweet. He'd give you his umbrella if it's raining and you didn't have one.

• Dude can cook, if you can call preparing instant ramen in the microwave 'cooking'.

• This guy loves meat and chewing on bones, so I bet he is also a secret cannibal, but only eats his victims. Gotta get rid of the bodies somehow! He has Peter help with preparing and cooking the meat, but Damon never says where he got it. Peter knows, though, but he don't really care.

• pet names for you: Babe, Sweetie, Lovely

♡NSFW♡

• Favorite positions are you on top, and the position where you're on your stomach and he has your arm behind your back.

• He is SO loving and gentle most of the time. He just wants to make sure you're getting enough. You will cum many times before he even finishes.

• but once in a while, expect to be sore in the morning, some bruises here and there from how much he grips you.

• master of seduction right here. He will whisper in your ear the sweetest yet dirtiest stuff, maybe some erotica limerick/sonnet he found online. His voice is so smooth it makes your core tingle just by hearing it.

• his dick is pretty average, but it's not a bad thing. It gets the job done just fine and you're not complaining.

• he does have a bondage fetish. He loves to tie you to the bed and on special occasions, like your birthday, he'll tie himself up and let you do whatever you want.

• Anal? Nah. Unless you beg for it.

• dude loves meat, so... he has a dolcett fetish. (Don't know what it is? ...eh google it, I'm not your mom. But don't say I didn't warn you.) He never acts on it really [he may eat people, but he doesn't get off to it because he feels like he'd be cheating on you], but his phone and laptop has a folder with hundreds of pics/videos of dolcett porn. Sort of a guily pleasure fetish, emphasis on the pleasure.

~~~~~

~♡~Alan~♡~

• He is such a good boi. Sweetest boi in the world. Pure sugar cookie.

• he is the outdoorsy guy, hunting, fishing, camping, all that stuff. Dude lives in the woods.

• he's the one who brings home fish or game for dinner. Preps it himself in the garage. Expect to find some deer or birds hanging from the ceiling.

• he's a pro at bonfires. Knows all the different ways to burn wood.

• Cooking? He prefers to grill or cook over a fire. He sometimes indulges in Damon's choice of meats, but no one ever tells him what it is. So don't tell him. It'd break the guy...

• he is such a sweetheart. Asking if you're feeling ok, if you need any help with anything, just so considerate. Heavy follower of PDA.

• unashamed cuddler. When you two go camping, he has you in the same sleeping bag as him.

• HUGE astrology and astronomy nerd. He will talk your ear off about the star constellations and tell you your horoscope of the day and if you are compatible with him or anyone else in the group.

• pet names: Doe-Eyes, darling, honey, dear, love

♡NSFW♡

• he's more on the gentler side of things. Perfect candidate for your first time. He will comfort you if it hurts and praise you so much.

• favorite positions are where he can look at you splayed out and writhing in pleasure. Mostly missionary.

• man is a pussy eater. On bad days, he gives you puppy dog eyes and asks to eat you out. With those eyes, you can't help but say yes.

• he likes to nibble and bite. Favorite place to bite is your thighs. He can leave marks, but never breaks skin. If he does, he'll stop and patch you up.

• his cock is the smallest in the group, but not in general. It's pretty average, nothing to complain about. He's a grower, not a shower. You secretly find his cock (both erect and flaccid) adorable, but you never say that to his face.

• does he do anal? Only if you ask him to, but even then, he's hesitant. He will make sure you're prepped well.

~~~~~

~♡~Jack~♡~

• the ray of sunshine in the group. Always trying to cheer people up.

• he loves to give hugs any time, any day, any where

• he is such an 80s retro nerd. He has a collection of games and movies from that era. Favorite movies are The Breakfast Club and Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Favorite arcade game is Dragon's Lair or Pac-Man.

• definitely the fashionista of the group. He loves to create outfits for you to wear, making sure the colors compliment each other. He does this for the other guys too, but some are not sure how to feel about it.

• dude is the kind of guy who would wear a nun's halloween outfit as his costume for reals and awaken some people while wearing it. He makes any outfit sexy.

• Cooking? He prefers to bake. Champion at breakfasts. Favorite thing to make is blueberry pancakes.

• Himbo. Just. Pure grade-A himbo.

♡NSFW♡

• bruh, this man will be cheery and bubbly during the day, total daddy at night. Holy shit.

• he will show you that you are his and only his. He's only sharing you with the other guys just to make you happy.

• man's got a body like Adonis. He's got a chest where he got man tiddies.

• his cock? HOLY FUCK. He's the biggest out of the group and he has to force his way inside you sometimes (this is canon, I swear, I've seen that clip). It is downright BEAUTIFUL. You swear, he is some sort of god.

• his favorite positions are 1) where you're both on your sides, him behind you, lifting your leg so he can plow you while kissing your neck and whispering sweet nothings and dirty shit in your ear. And 2) that position where you're on your belly and he is behind you, raising your ass to him and he has your arm pinned behind your back.

• he is definitely heavy on the praise. He sees you as a goddess. Expect him to make you cum multiple times before he even gets inside you, just to make sure you're putty in his hands and ready for him.

• does he do anal? Fuck yeah he does. But he's very careful about it and only does it when you say it's ok.

~~~~~

~♡John♡~

• and then there's John.

• he's just a crack baby.

• sorry, John Doe stans. I just couldn't get that much on this guy.

• he's essentially the pet dog of the group. But it's fine, he's into that.

• he's pretty much a feral animal.

• is fueled by energy drinks and Doritos.

• he LOVES when Damon feeds him the special meat he's collected. He gobbles that shit up.

• dude snuggles you like a puppy. He can be cute and sweet when he wants to, don't get me wrong here. Puppies are always sweet and cute.

• hates baths. Y/N has to chain him to the tub in order to bathe him.

• usually stays in his room. He plays Call of Duty with Peter and loves to watch zombie movies. Favorite movie is Cannibal Holocaust and City of the Living Dead. Ruggero Deodato, Lucio Fulci, and George A Romero are his idols.

• Cooking? No idea how. Anything already prepared is perfect for him.

♡NSFW♡

• you into werewolf quality sex? John's your guy.

• expect tons of nail marks and bites all over you once you're done.

• man will make you bleed.

• some nights, the guys will hear you yell "CHILL THE FUCK OUT!!" from your bedroom.

• he will almost eat you alive, he's that feral.

• Does he do anal? Duh.

• favorite position is you up against the wall.

~~~~~

Yandere Quintet Dynamics

Peter & John Doe: Gaming buddies

Jack & Alan: Big bro (Jack), little bro (Alan)

Peter and Damon: Constant dick-measuring (metaphorically, of course) at first, but now partners in crime (oh they'll double-team ya). They like discussing true crime stuff, enough to where they have a podcast.

Damon & John Doe: Man (Damon) using dog (John Doe) to hide evidence.

Jack & Peter: total nerd buddies. Trivia night is horrible with them.

Jack & John Doe: kid being terrified of dogs (Jack), rabid dog (John Doe)

Alan & Peter: another big bro (Peter), little bro (Alan) dynamic.

Alan & John Doe: hunter (Alan) and his hunting dog (John Doe)

Jack & Damon: guy (Damon) is annoyed by the other guy (Jack), but secretly enjoys his company.

Damon & Alan: same deal as Damon and Jack, but Damon will kill anyone trying to hurt or be mean to Alan.

~~~~~

Aaaaand that's all she wrote! Hope you enjoyed this feast!

[cinnasalmon]

→ Zevlor SFW Alphabet

Various SFW relationship (mostly romantic, but some platonic too) headcanons, one letter at a time! Very long. Sorry not sorry. I have a lot of thoughts

NSFW Alphabet here !

→ A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Doting to the mf MAXIMUM. It's almost sickening. He's not super into PDA, but he will always have a hand on the small of his partner's back and be the first to open doors so he can hold it open for them. This has a risk of other couples in public to start arguing because “how come you're not like that with me?” 

For real though he is so affectionate, and it's always the little things, too. Like if he's on his way back from the temple and a food cart is offering a free sample of something, he asks for another to bring to his sweetheart.

→ B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Mom/Dad/Parent friend. Overly responsible, always offering to help, and it's one thing when someone comes at him sideways—he can take the heat (begrudgingly)—but it's an entirely different thing when it's one of his buds. He has an extremely small friend circle, and he considers them family.

Friendship progression is slow and really only happens if he sees them regularly: a regular at the temple or they work together there, they're his neighbors, etc. He's got trust issues out the wazoo, though (thanks Avernus/Elturel). So be very, very patient. 

→ C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

YES goodness gracious yes. He loves cuddling, or any kind of physical touch. Big spoon, little spoon, it does not matter to him so long as he's in physical contact with his partner. 

Though, he prefers as much of his body flushed against theirs (the more skin-on-skin contact, the better); we're talking arms holding each other, legs tangled, heads buried in the other's, etc. If his partner is also a tiefling, their tails will be intertwined as much as possible. If his partner is a non-tiefling, his tail will be coiled around one of their legs.

→ D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He's been wanting to settle down for decades. But, a Hellrider is for life. His career was always to be his priority: even if he had a family at home, even if his own life was in danger. 

But the moment he can finally settle down, soldiering days behind him, you can bet he'll be pitching in happily to the household chores. He may not be the greatest cook, but he'll tease he can chop the hell out of a vegetable.

→ E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Oh this is a nightmare scenario for him. He'll exhaust every possible option of salvaging the relationship before resorting to this. Once he commits to his partner, he doesn't let go easily. But if it comes down to it, he'll plan it out and whip out the ‘ol “We need to talk.” 

From being a commander in the past, he's not afraid of confrontation, but he'll still be gritting his teeth as he bites the bullet to end it. 

→ F = Fiancé (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

As stated above, once he commits to his partner, he's locked in; he dates with marriage as the end goal. Whether he's been married before or not, at his age now, this is it. So, he'll take his time before deciding to pop the question. Buuut he doesn't wait forever, though. He's a classic romantic, so no games or leading someone on. If his partner reciprocates with the same enthusiasm? Well he'll be down on one knee in no time.

→ G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Paladins who swear to an oath of devotion follow a set of tenants, one of these is to aid others, protect the weak, and punish those who prey upon them (labeled under Compassion). A sturdy and strong hand to slay enemies should also be capable of being soothing and with great care to those the paladin is sworn to defend. Zevlor is no exception to this. Even if his oath is broken, it's still in his nature to be like this.

As far as emotions? Much as he may try to appear stoic and calm, he wears his emotion on his face. And despite having the flames of Hell sat on onyx for eyeballs, they show a lot. I personally love the headcanon that the flames will brighten or dim depending on his emotions and I will stand by that proudly.

→ H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

As stated before, physical touch is something this man wants at nearly all times. So it's no surprise he gives great hugs. They're so gentle and calming, and even if the person he's hugging is taller or bigger than him, they'll feel enveloped by his touch. And being a tiefling, his body temperature runs higher, so his hugs are nice and toasty. 

He'll embrace his partner often, and he particularly loves hugs from behind (both giving and receiving). People hug from the front all the time, so coming up from the rear is quite a bit more intimate. He craves closeness in every sense of the word.

→ I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He'll want to say it much sooner than he finally does. This is sooo cheesy, but he'll be staring at the side or back of his partner, feeling that wave of nerves, butterflies in his stomach, and the swells in his chest, but those short little words are caught at the top of his throat. His partner will notice him and curiously ask, “What are you looking at?” and he will say, “Sorry, I… was drifting in thought,” until one day his partner will once again curiously ask with an accompanied chuckle, “What are you looking at?” to which he will blurt out “I love you.” 

→ J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

This man will  n e v e r  admit he's jealous. But boy does it show. His words are short, blunt. He won't look his partner in the eye. They'll have to coax it out of him. Simply asking “Wait, are you jealous?” will not work. In fact, it will likely send him further into painfully obvious denial.

Since his oath and faith were broken and lost, his ego is um… quite fragile, moreso when it comes to things in his life he believes he doesn't deserve. Like his partner. Especially his partner. 

→ K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses are so sweet your blood sugar levels will skyrocket. 

So, so gentle and loving. He can certainly be rough when the time calls for it, but overall he's slow and even methodical a bit; he kisses like each one could be his last.

In public, he'll give a peck here and there, but at home? Showers his partner in kisses. Everywhere. It's one of the easiest and simplest ways to show how much he truly adores them.

He doesn't really have a preference where he likes to be kissed, but he blushes a bit and feels soft and mushy when it's anywhere on his face (especially cheeks, temples, and forehead) or any of his infernal features on his body. If his partner kisses the back of his hand, he'll freeze for a moment, then the bashfulness comes out.

→ L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He loves kids! I'd like to think that if asked what he would be if not a Hellrider, he would answer a schoolteacher (shout out to Early Access). He sees children as limitless potential with an insatiable curiosity; they are the future. And of course, he's always wanted children of his own, and perhaps a part of him still wants to try…!

→ M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Slow and easy. Decades of being a Hellrider waking up before dawn to report for duty? He is over it. Now he can finally take his time and savor the mornings.

If he's up before his partner and isn't helping out at the temple that day, he'll stick around and read a book until he hears them stirring awake. Once they're awake, it doesn't take much coaxing to get him back in bed. 

If both end up sleeping in, they're not leaving that bed for at least an hour after they wake up. Just cuddling and chatting, enjoying each other's company. Afterwards, they always make breakfast together.

→ N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Evenings are typically relaxing. After dinner, he'll read or write a bit (he loves his poetry), have a glass of wine or two with his partner, or any other similar winding-down type of activity. 

He has insomnia and frequent nightmares, and no matter how many nights his partner will be adamant to stay up with him, the warmth radiating from his body as well as the soothing baritones of his voice guarantee that will never happen.

→ O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He harbors a lot of secrets and stress within him. He's very wise, but oftentimes wisdom is formed from hardship. He's reluctant to share much aside from surface-level tidbits until the relationship matures and he feels safe and secure enough to let his guard down. Even then, he's definitely someone who will still reveal things about himself years into a relationship or friendship.

→ P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He has a temper for sure, especially if a soft spot was hit. That being said, he's also quick to calm himself. Being a leader—a leader in the military, at that—he cannot let himself get caught up in the heat of the moment; he has to catch himself before it gets to that point, even if his anger is justified (see: the confrontation with Aradin).

→ Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He's got a pretty good memory, but when it comes to his relationship? Almost nothing will need to be repeated to him. Hell, he'll write it down on scrap paper and tuck it in one of his journals if he has to. 

If his partner works at a busy place in the city, he'll remember every co-worker his partner complains or raves about. Our man stays on top of the work drama: “Had a long day, darling? Was it that Galawyn again?”

→ R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

I think Zevlor's favorite moments in a relationship would be the little moments. Hearing his partner's fits of laughter, how peaceful they look asleep next to him, the way their eyes light up when they see a poster that their favorite traveling bard will be performing in town soon. 

And of course, it goes without saying his all-time favorite moment would be the classics: the wedding day and/or the birth of their child!

→ S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

HAh this man is a guard dog. Even before they become a part of his oath, he's adamant to protect his person, his one and only. During the budding/honeymoon stage of the relationship this will be extremely obvious. Lots of, “Dear, please be careful with that,” or “Would you like me to accompany you?” As if they didn't personally kill the Chosen of the Dead Three along with a Netherbrain. 

But for Zevlor to be the protected one? On the outside, he'll insist he's fine and that he can hold his own just fine, he's a grown man, etc. And he is right. But on the inside, he'll be so relieved to be tended to. So relieved, in fact, that he actually feels a bit guilty (but that's a whole other can of worms).

→ T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Oh he'll remember. He keeps track. Never will need to be reminded of something. He's someone who has that uncanny ability to bring his partner a random gift and they'll respond “How did you know I wanted this?!” and the bastard will shrug and smirk. He knows. He just knows. 

→ U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

His biggest one is he will easily and nearly automatically put himself down at every opportunity. Early in the relationship it's to the point he doesn't even realize he's doing it until it's pointed out. He's always had this mindset to a degree, but even still, he was a much different person in Elturel as a Commander vs. now. The trauma from Avernus combined with the aftermath of being blamed for it (and then subsequently exiled), as well as the events of the Shadow Lands, all did a number on his psyche.

I'm also not gonna lie—he can be a little codependent, especially if the relationship is new. It's easy to fall down that slippery slope when you want to serve others, especially loved ones. He may occasionally have to be reminded he can be “selfish” and accept the fact his partner can do things for him that he doesn't need to reciprocate!

→ V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Not terribly concerned. Well, not terribly concerned unless his partner is young and/or considered attractive by others (though he will always believe they are the hottest in all the land), then he'll feel very self-conscious and in need of some validation and reassurance. 

He does like to maintain good hygiene and prefers to wear simple, clean, and comfortable clothes. 

→ W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He's a sappy romantic at his core, so once he finds his person, he will absolutely say they complete him.

While he had his comrades in the cavalry, all who were extremely close-knit and loyal to one another, they couldn't fill all his wants and needs. When they were able to take some leave, many of them had spouses and children waiting for them to come back home, and Zevlor had always lamented that.

→ X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

We got a nail biter over here! I recently saw this front-view of an idle animation as he stood over the map of Elturgard, and while it very well could be a generic idle animation not specific to him, imo, the shoe fits perfectly I'm afraid. 

He holds his hand over his mouth somewhat nervously, and you could say he's just pondering but I don't care! He's biting his nails okay!!!

→ Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

In a partner: if they're non-committal. No guessing games, wishy-washy, flaky nonsense. However, he is willing to wait if they want to take it slow and work through some stuff (and he'll be happy to assist them in any way he can). He just doesn't want to be with someone who treats him as a backup or if he feels like they're just settling for him.

In general: I have 0 evidence for this but I think he doesn't like tight spaces. Claustrophobia, if you will. Perhaps it's a lack of an easy escape or is limited in his movements, but he haaaates it. Even being in a crowd makes him uneasy. 

→ Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

After canon events, he takes naps frequently. All that stress and his nervous system stuck in survival mode for the past several months will catch up to him, and to try and recover, he'll feel sleepy a lot. Known to begin to drift to sleep while embracing his partner, even while standing (he will deny this if confronted).

He also snores. Not loudly by any means, but it's a dead giveaway that he actually made it into a nice, deep sleep, as he's normally a light sleeper and has some gnarly insomnia sometimes. Almost always falls asleep after his partner and wakes up before them in the morning.

———

If you made it this far congrats! Also I encourage you to fill out this alphabet too, for Zevlor or whoever!

[spikezonebby]

KOBDSS is my ot3. I adore them so much!! BD and SS love KO and while BD is a huge softy, SS has trouble showing his affection (thanks megatron). I think KO is the one proposing this polyamorous relationship since he kinda started liking SS too, being very open about the interest towards SS while speaking with BD

It might all have started with them watching human movies occasionally but it turned to become something more over time. Maybe they all had a little too much high grade at some point and started with soft kisses which left SS confused but not dissapointed?

Breakdown like "Oh boy! Two husbands!" because I cannot see this man as EVER being the jealous sort. That's KO and SS's deal, he's the rock between them.

I headcanon Knocks to actually be a reformatted Seeker that traded his wings for wheels too, so he understands the subtlest aspect of flight frame body language too. He reads it loud and clear when SS is freaked out or stressing or happy. He KNOWS Starscream likes him and can read that shit clear as day, because lets be real, SS is an open book once you know what to look for.

Combine that with the common headcanon that Starscream's got some level of trauma from losing his trine (I haven't finished the novels but I know that was entirely his fault), and you've got TRUST AND CONFIDENCE ISSUES OUT THE WAZOO BABY

I love the idea though that these huge titans, terrifying forces to behold each in their own right, end up having one of the softest romances. Because honestly all three of them deserve it. This is an au where Breakdown doesn't die, where eventually all three of them end up as Autobots, and all three of them get some fucking therapy.

Oh yeah, and SS bottoms for both of them because I say so.

[jazeswhbhaven]

Just wanted to come in and say that I never seen your comments and jokes about any WHB characters as offensive.

Besides if people hate Levi because he has a stick up his ass...then they're valid because the people who do love him are aware that he has a stick up his ass, but like the other kings he's complex too. Pretty much a "Yes, and?" situation. People getting worked up over 2D characters isn't new...but getting worked up over a porn game where any source of sensibility is out the wazoo is funny to me. Seriously we got crazy phillia kins going on and don't forget Levi's Attacker card where he and MC diddled so much they flooded the ENTIRE Castle with their yknowums.

Also I feel like MC hate is the only acceptable norm at this point because well the past comments speak and the ingame narration for themselves. Self-inserts have more personality than whatever cardboard cutout PB decided to use.

Anon, when I tell you I was hoping for some in-depth reason why Leviathan was pre-cumming buckets when MC first arrived....because I can only imagine walking in a sea of cum. Demon spunk if you will. The unholy juice.

Only to just know that it's some backstory of his trauma being the reason and nothing breeding related or just anything primal in his instincts. O K. lol

But that's just that. Like for me any diss against Levi is very surface level it's not even scratching the softest of material. I could rant all day why I get the "why are you being mean?" treatment but that's irrelevant to this game and this fandom lol

Plus. Leviathan canon wise would just not care like, he has better things to worry about than what a smol blip of a human soul like me has to say about him.

As for the MC discourse? Yeah that's pretty much nothing new lol. The fandom hate to see me comin' mentioning anything to do with them that isn't just a headcanon with the bois lol

[datasoong101]

1 & 19 for the Star Trek as game! 🖖

Oh wait that's hard. Errrrrmmmmm.

Favorite episode has gotta be one of the Data ones, Data's Day, Data Lore, Brothers, Descent, one of those. OH WAIT BIRTHRIGHT HOLD UP THAT MIGHT BE IT.

I definitely headcanon that Data had emotions pre-chip, they were just different. Not entirely sure if the chip was a placebo or something else, but my guys got feelings out the wazoo from the very beginning either way.

[katsigian]

27, 47 & 48 for Valen ☺️♥️

Thank you for the questions! <3 p.s. I am so so sorry these took forever to answer; they got lost within my 400+ drafts and completely slipped my mind 😞

27. Have they ever had run ins with the badges?

A small handful of times! But they're normally because he was being a creature on his own personal time rather than something work related. The company he works for has lawyers out the wazoo and could get him out of most problems if any were to come up (though he's a bit too professional and skilled at his work to be caught). The couple of times Valen has been caught by the police, it was because he got too wound up in a bar fight or decided to deal some 'find out' to someone who fucked around too hard. Those three times he's been arrested, he goes willingly because his one phone call is always to his handler at Ares Systems, Niko Mars, who will (very exasperatedly) handle it. "It's in your job title: handler = handle." < something Valen has said to him before (not in an asshole way, but in a 'I know you love me' way). Niko pulls some strings and Valen is walking out of the NCPD holding cell free as a bird within a couple hours. Valen gets yelled at by Niko, Valen buys Niko a coffee, and he arrives at work the next day for another contract. Valen knows he's valuable to Ares Systems and he also knows that being hauled in for disturbing the peace won't result in anything serious. He just hates jail cells and the NCPD doesn't need his fingerprints on file.

47. Share a headcanon about your character and their partner(s).

Nathan (belongs to @rindemption) paints Valen's nails when he's bored. It happened one day that Nathan painted his own nails and then hauled Valen over to paint his too because he wasn't done painting nails but he'd ran out of nails. Nathan picked black polish for him, of course, and Valen sat so very still, was so good, and was so patient while Nathan gave him a manicure. The only thing is that Valen didn't expect to end up liking the polish 😂 whenever Nathan decides to paint them, Valen takes pretty good care of the polish because he kinda likes the look of it. Plus he gets to sit quietly and adore Nathan for 15 minutes. Nathan gets this particular look on his face when he's really focused on something and Valen finds it adorable.

48. Share three songs you associate with your character and their partner(s).

Beside Myself - Hesta Prynn

Soul Mate - Flora Cash - this one makes me weepy

Feel For Me - Foy Vance

Handsome Man - Matt Alber + 1 more because this one never fails to make me tear up each time. I am right now. I think it's this part that's my favourite

[trrickytickle]

ICarly: Tickle Headcanons 🎥📺

I kid you not this song goes so hard

ok this feels SLIGHTLY offensive to write for some reason, but I enjoyed it a bunch, request for @tickle-beans

Carly Shay 🌐

As a ler: Her years of living together with Spencer have made her a professional ler. She's mastered quite a few techniques, including tummy-squeezes and dreaded claws of anticipation.. Gangs up on Freddie with Sam, because obviously! Also always gets her chances to get revenge on Spencer, who always teases her for being ticklish when really he's where she got that gene. Once collaborated with Socko to create tickle socks for the show. Most def switch vibes up the wazoo, and is the type to laugh while tickling her ler. Will come up with tickle activities for the webshow (because she HAS)

As a lee: Carly's very obviously and canonically got a ticklish tummy, and it's even canon that Spencer tickles her to cheer her up/annoy her most of the time. They ABSOLUTELY tk fight literally because it's so canonically implied and sibling dynamics have some of the best tickle potential because like??? HELLO. Sam and Freddie also tickle her frequently. A more general headcanon I have is that Carly gang sans Spencer also tickle each other a ton. Her worst spots besides her tummy are her sides and armpits.

Sam Puckett 🧦

As a ler:

Feral as a ler. Will literally just jump at wherever she can tickle and tickle it good. Likes to tease- but it sounds more like threatening. She definitely gets more injured than the lee when she's tickling someone (Freddie and Carly, mainly) and likes to chase lees with wiggling fingers. Knows all of Freddie and Carly's spots, even has charts of them because you know, feral. Whenever a tickle fight starts between the gang, the word "fight" sends a feral response into her brain and she becomes evil asf like she already is. Let's face it, she probably has some strange tk tool, think butter sock. When she goes on to live with Cat, she's the main ler for her, same goes for Carly. Doesn't help that she's stubborn and ticklish and iCarly probably has had a ton of tickle episodes though. Always takes advantage of Freddie's ticklishness because he's Freddie. The butt of the joke, duh

As a lee-

Kicker. Scrapper. Squealer. All of the -ers. Will curse people's firstborns. Spencer is the only one who can manage to hold her down- has the advantage of size. Freddie always tries to tickle her but she turns the tables immediately. Ticklish literally everywhere, only Carly is able to tickle her successfully even IF she does bite- or probably worse. Definetly worse. According to the DGITVSCU (Dan Get In The Van Schneider Cinematic Universe) Sam literally is banned in 6 US states. I'm scared of her, always have been.

Freddie Benson 📽️ As a lee: Always been tickled, like his whole life. Ticklish everywhere, most often tickled by his senile mother AND to make it worse, his friends. Most frequent ler is Sam, who's the most evil ler out of the gang. Honestly, scratch the "his friends" part. Mostly Sam. Still, though, singled out as the lee of the gang. Also bro wears like, the same 5 polo shirts. It was just funny so I pointed it out. Has a loud, wheezy and snorty laugh, which Carly, Sam and Gibby (and potential other guest stars) think is hilarious- well except the main 2 girls, they secretly find it adorable of the love triangle thing they got going for them.

As a ler: This man is out for blood and revenge. Favorite spots to tickle are the sides, ribs and armpits, and always revenge-tickles to no avail, except when he does. He would engage in great switch-banter with any of the girls, though.

Spencer Shay 🎨

As a lee: Reluctant, but doesn't hate it. Often tickled as a bribe by Carly and/or the iCarly crew (most frequently as a means to convince him to do Baby Spencer) Worst spot is his tummy much like his similarly creative sister. Will get tickled as a means of performance art or anything similar. I want this guy as a brother so bad. His laugh is frantic, loud and he's a thrasher but tries not to hurt his ler. Will shut his eyes and whatnot and try to retaliate using his strength advantages.

As a ler: Corny, cheesy, fatherly. Incredibly dorky, will make dad-jokes and play tickle games, as well as pretend to sculpt his lee (typically Carly) like clay. Has lots of fun as a ler, it's all in part to his duty as the fun, paternal figure to be good at tickling. Her favorite spot to tickle is the tummy (it's Carly's worst spot, sooo) and reluctantly takes part in the iCarly.com tickling escapades. Has tickle techniques memorized and whatnot, and enjoys making his lee immobile by pinning them.

[arcxnumvitae]

Fandom Mischaracterizations

@soraeia said: the dragons >:D ❤️

Jianhuren: Misgendered despite using they/them because of their more "stereotypically" gendered appearances. Only fanart ever drawn is of their masculine form, new people to the fandom are very surprised to learn they have a feminine form at all despite each form getting equal screentime in media. Any trauma and issues related to their histories and actions with their students is ignored in favor of relegating them solely to the wise old mentor archetype. Received some unfortunate characterizations based on Qingshan’s one-sided unrequited crush on them despite them being completely unaware of it and not at all involved.

Qingshan: Completely ignores any scrap of ace-coding she has. Headcanons her as everything else under the sun BUT ace. Also her muscles are gone. For some reason included as a villain in the same exact ranks of actual innocent-slaughterers and world-enders. "Love can fix her!"

Huaxiu: Flattens all of his negative traits for the sole purpose of making him a more ideal partner to “save” them/their ocs/other character in said media they ship Huaxiu with/whoever/etc. Gets mad when said negative traits appear in the canon media. Ignores the trauma-based nuance behind Huaxiu’s preference of masculine partners over the years vs feminine and you bet it will not be engaged with at all in fanon. Fandom is likely too busy focusing on whatever ship wars he’s in. “Love can fix him.” Ignores Minglian. Even worse, treats Minglian as an obstacle in the way of any ships despite the fact that she’s not a romantic interest at all and is Just There.

Meihui: She loves teasing people so that would be kicked up about 20 notches. Always asking Xiaodan for tips and help with her swordplay despite her being older, more experienced, and way more skilled at it than him. Only ever makes an appearance in fan material to prop up Xiaodan's own strength and skills.

Xiaodan: Because he has a resting face, not even a resting bitch face but just a resting face, his only fanon portrayal is “angery.” Ramps up his fondness of sweets to his only other defining trait. Sex god daddy…somehow, despite having been an uninterested virgin thus far in the series.

Minglian: There are no fanon interpretations of Minglian because she is treated solely as Huaxiu’s accessory at best and completely ignored at worst. If she got any, then she’s infantilized out the wazoo. Precious baby can’t do a single thing without her teacher, never says a word against him, and does not act any way of her own volition. Needs to be protected from anything and naïve to the point of being a pushover unable to live and function without assistance. Gets called the dreaded M*** S**

Zhifeng: Woobifies them into only a doe-eyed, sweet being despite them genuinely and explicitly having a foul personality when they're not playing polite. Wife-ification, ignoring said sour traits and softening them into a stereotypically, traditionally feminine, traditionally "wife" role even though it is wildly ooc and then declares that characterization as canon. Zhifeng: *dresses in gnc ways, actively makes it known they're genderfluid, never uses just masculine pronouns, 'I am not a man'* The fandom: What a handsome pretty-boy, I'm going to only call you "he" and constantly use only masculine-gendered terms like boy and man to refer to you, my beautiful little cis male <3. Also sex doll-ifies them despite any and all sexual aspects of their character being explicitly a survival method and not something they engaged with because they genuinely wanted to. Who cares, they're obsessed with sex now!

[jeeyuns]

THE BIRTH CHART POST HELLO !!!!

virgo moon/taurus rising for always being in other people's business but NEVER wanting anyone else's input on his own is SOOOO real. i love BOTH of these they feel like different versions of eddie throughout the seasons. amanda's is definitely giving eddie's lighter moments which i love! all that leo matching buck's energy (which i'd love to get into if u want asgdhdhdh)

he definitely has prominent placements in scorpio/virgo/leo im sooo sure about that. him having that 12h leo stellium and feeling like he needs to suppress his Fun side vs home/family bringing out the best in him (leo 4h) aka every single buckley-diaz family scene. both of these work so well they feel like a progression somehow

also that virgo venus and him being very picky about who he lets in (chefs kiss)

sorry im rambling i could go on all day about these things lmao

no please go on! i love how we all headcanon these characters as different points in their journeys. it's pure art and love shown in the best way possible as fans.

i agree! scorpio/leo/virgo up the wazoo. that virgo is soooo prominent in his precise hands and his pickyness totes chef's kiss. and am intrigued by your 12h leo stellium thought vs the leo 4h thought and totally vibe with all of it.

buck SO has leo vibes. i headcanon buck as having a leo 7h. here, let me show you my buck idea

Buck (July 11, 1992)

cancer sun / sagittarius moon / aquarius rising

traditional yet progressive, sensitive, thoughtful, fervent, considerate, has a fine intellect, wholehearted, impressive yet impressionable, sometimes shy, reserved yet talkative, kind, idealistic, encouraging, brings out the best in others, needs to travel and discover new horizons charming, vulnerable, honest, outspoken, the cancer that has the least amount of need for roots and family, dramatic, exaggerates things, makes mountains out of molehills, emotional, volatile, intuitive, sarcastic to hide their vulnerability and dependency, deeply private about their feelings loves and fears change and excitement, when assured of love and affection they can face the music and dance, super resilient, philosophical about problems, imaginative, restless, changeable, good-humoured, has a restrained defiance, has lofty ideals about their loved ones and are disappointed when they turn out to be mere mortals gives a relationship everything they’ve got, slightly hypocritical, wanderers, may keep their feelings a secret even from themselves, seems to be extremely open and up-front yet a lot lurks beneath the surface, independent, visionary, has an ear for music and/or musically inclined, has an eye for beauty, prone to mood swings, can be despondent especially when someone hasn’t lived up to their romantic ideal when it comes to partners they want a parent and a playmate, sociable, quietly flirtatious even, can be quite possessive, needs total freedom yet craves intimacy, one of life’s romantics, the most adventurous cancer

[theangiediary]

happy wincest wednesday! what's your favorite headcanon for how femme John wanted Dean to be? Not at all, kind of blurry boundaries, panties & apron, etc --?

I'm not sure if I'm reading this correctly: fem!Dean (Deanna) or feminized masc!Dean? (I've only met guys irl that describe themselves as femme if they also identify as gay, which Dean canonically.. isn't). But I have two answers!

For Deanna, I think he would have wanted someone like Ellen Ripley (or Ellen Harvelle lol). Strong, brave, unfussy, but also beautiful, patient, maternal. A Man's Woman, not girly. Femme? Sure, but she probably wouldn't know that word.

And Dean.. well. I think he's very pretty, very malleable, and absolutely adorable when treated with tenderness. I love the idea of them getting into Moods where Dean acts as John's little wife, all sweet and servicing in his little pink panties 🩷. Role playing Sam as their kid (pillow talk about how Sammy's doing in school, what John needs to tune up in his truck, where their finances are, etc). But outside these moments they keep Dean's role as Big Brother, which isn't quite Mother. Simultaneous with the Protect drive is this.. sameness? Between brothers? There's an 24/7 ownership to Mother ("I'd die for MY baby") that looks more like duty in siblings ("sometimes he's my best friend, sometimes I hate him, but when it comes down to it I'll give my life for him bc I HAVE to").

I have no idea if that makes sense. Basically, no, for like 80% of the time, when they're not fucking, John and/or Sam don't want Dean to be femme. They can get what they need from him in masc form.

But Dean's got issues and insecurities up the wazoo, including about his appearance, sexualization, and soft hearted/family centeredness that comes from society/others, so pressing on those during sex is delicious. John stroking Dean's teary face, bc he's just so so full and it hurts, and calling him babygirl? Yes. John coming up behind Dean at the stove and putting one hand on his hip, the other on his tit, and nipping at neck and ears while telling him he "treats us so good"? Yeah. Sam can also do those things, but it'd probably be more "you're so beautiful" and "treats ME so good".

I also have a soft spot for them slow dancing, where John doesn't even think to let Dean lead, and Dean never asks 🥺.

(I play less often with Dean initiating any more than subtle flirting/begging, but I'm open to it. Silent communication after John gets back from a hunt, climbing into his bed at night, acting goofy with too much to drink and shaking his ass in John and/or Sam's face. Which is getting away from your ask, but during these things I imagine Dean's inner dialogue might skew towards femme-ish patterns, like "why am I acting like this I'm not Mary" "he probably thinks I'm so needy" "I want to wear his ring".)

[seaofserene]

We talked before; need the cursed fankid now

if they had a kid. (accepting)

Name: Leviathan (nickname: Levi)

Gender: girl

General appearance: i'm thinking she's got short cropped quills like how serenity used to have when she was mortal, just extra spiky. her fur is kind of a blue-ish green, but has a lighter/paler green ombre thing going on at the ends of her quills + occasional dark navy markings. also, her eyes are a striking emerald green.

Personality: doomsday demon thing. jesus christ. she has the combined aspects of both her parents impulsivity and 'why not? why shouldn't i?' attitude + entitlement out the wazoo thank to her parents enabling. i'm getting like. evil little mermaid vibes...

Special talents: super speed, regenerative healing, clairvoyance, hydrokinesis. also doesn't need to breathe so the land and sea are both her playgrounds.

Who they like better: scourge. is a daddy's girl for sure.

Who they take after more: it's really hard to say because her parents are quite similar and there's a lot of both in there. probably more like scourge though. but by god does the sadism come out so easily...

Personal headcanon: she can't sing for shit. good god, don't let her near a microphone. also scourge came up with the name because it sounded badass.

Face Claim:

may or may not of raided auntie fi's closet

[sunsetrcse]

Random Amy thoughts cuz my mutuals are inspiring and slaying.

I’m glad I’ve come to really like Amy as I got older. As a kid/teen watching Sonic X and playing the early sonic games like Heroes, I was always frustrated by her and couldn’t pinpoint why. I think looking back on it, I didn’t like that she was written kinda one note more often then not, though that may still be through my kid-lense as I haven’t watched the show in quite a bit. That’s not to say she didn’t have her moments! But I feel like they weren’t showcased enough until recently.

it’s actually the fandom that made me come around more to her, giving thoughts and ideas and headcanons based on what we got to expand her character, and now with what I know of the IDW comics (that I want to get paper back versions of so bad) she has more….substance to her?

now, keep in mind, this is all from the prospective of someone who really needs to go back and refresh my memory on things, as well as catch up on newer stuff (I haven’t even beat frontiers yet but i liked Amy so far in it!) so like take my ramblings with a grain of salt.

tldr: Amy slays and I wish nothing but the best for her (and sometimes thinks she could do better than sonic, man’s got commitment issues out the wazoo)

[blastthechaos]

Makoto!

1:My first impression of him.

Nice hoodie.

2:When I think I truly started to like him?

I think just seeing him in action made me start liking him lol. He's just cool.

3:A song that reminds me of them.

Honestly, there's many lol, I guess I just list these two.

4:How many people do I ship him with?

Junko, Celeste, Sayaka, Kyoko, Byakuya, Mukuro...I could go on honestly.

Then if we count Crossovers there's Storyshift Chara, Hina Kagiyama and a few more...

5:My favorite ship with him.

Man, I wonder what could it be? Could it be-It's Naejunko, at this point it's fucking obvious.

6:My least favorite ship with him.

None really, If I see a ship I don't like that he has I shrug and move on.

7:A quote of him that you remember.

"I refuse to get bored! I refuse to throw it all away! I REFUSE TO DESPAIR!"

8:Your favorite outfit of him.

The one from THH, it's a no brainer really, it has drip up the wazoo.

9:Your least favorite outfit for him.

Anything that isn't his THH outfit, it's just too cool for me to prefer anything else...though I guess if I had to pick one, it be the one shown at the end of DR3 as Headmaster.

10:Describe him in one sentence.

Unluckily lucky guy filled with Hope and Determination for eternity.

11:What's the first thing you think about when thinking about the character.

People don't realize how cool he is.

12:Sexuality HC!

Pansexual.

13:Your favorite friendship he has.

The one with the males from Class 78, also the one he has with Hajime and Shuichi in the UTDP/DRS universe.

14:Best storyline he has.

The one from THH all the way up to DR3.

Also the one he has in DRS where he saves everyone from Monokuma even if he got his ass kicked.

15:Worst storyline he has.

None that I think are bad.

16:A childhood headcanon.

I had a long complicated story in my head about how he obtained his hoodie that's too long to explain here.

17:What do you think his first word was?

"No that's wrong!" When his parents were feeling down on themselves.

18:How do you think he was a child?

A nice kid, maybe a little more reserved and a loner, though that's because I think he was more of a loner Pre-Hope's Peak

19:The most random ship people have with him.

It's not my place to say it

20:A weird headcanon.

I like to think he likes the delinquent/dark aesthetic which is why he dressed the way he does.

He also doesn't like being compared to an angel cause he likes the aesthetic and look of a demon more, a friendly demon obviously.

21:When do you think he was at his happiest?

In Hope's Peak with Class 78, his friends and his girlfriend Junko before everything went to hell.

22:When do you think he was at his lowest?

After the end of the first class trial after he found out that Sayaka backstabbed him and that she's now dead, plus the fact Leon died too.

23:Future Headcanon.

He holds out for Junko and never seeks another til his final days.

I think he's the last of Class 78...and the last person related to Hope's Peak during the time he entered the school to die, his luck was so potent that it kept him alive til his 150s.

24:What do you think is a secret he never told anyone?

That he wet the bed til 5th grade, what else?

25:When do you think he acted his most OOC?

Not really have an specific moment...I guess that he didn't broke out of the Despair brainwashing by his own?

26:When do you think he was "himself" the most?

Facing Junko in the last class trial and constantly standing up to her til he defeated her.

27:If he could meet a character from another series. Who would be the most fun of him to meet?

Aside from my crossover ships...

I guess meeting STC Sonic because how both of them are so similar yet so different at the same time.

28:The most unnecessary things he ever did?

...I guess him trying to save the Remnants? He didn't have to do it and nobody would have blamed him if he didn't, but he choose to save them anyways...and that's why he is so great.

29:How do you think he would be as a parent?

I think he be a nice and doting parent who let's his kids have their own space.

30:The funniest scene he had?

I think whenever he sasses up his classmates is funny, especially cause I always imagine him doing Ina deadpan manner.

[desertfangs]

👻 and 💥

👻 What is your wildest headcanon?

I don't know about wildest but one of my weirder, funnier headcanons is this: Daniel and Armand inadvertently once appeared in a background shot of Miami Vice. Like super brief, barely there, blink and you miss it in the background. They didn't realize it at the time, but later they spotted it on the television and Daniel thought it was hilarious.

But the fun part is that I think someone in his family also saw it. His sister, maybe. Like this is in the Night Island years, possibly after Daniel is vampire. And he's very much missing as far as his family is concerned, save for those checks they keep getting from lawyer in Miami. And then one night, there's this guy who sort of looks like Daniel walking by in the background of the show. And the sister maybe is like "It's him, it's Danny!" but it's so quick and everyone is just super skeptical and thinks that she's just seeing what she wants to see. So she records a rerun on VHS and they watch it over and over and no one can agree, some people don't even think it looks like him and it just becomes this mystery of Molloy Family Lore about whether their missing relative was the guy in the background of an 80s tv show. 💥 What is one canon thing that you wish you could change?

I'm with @apoptoses, I wish the later books had focused more on Lestat, Louis, Armand, Daniel, with a side order of Marius, Jesse, Gabrielle, and Bianca, instead of a whole a parade of new characters and David Talbot and the Mayfairs (who I often forget are even involved in this series!) Some new characters are fine and could have been interesting new blood (heh) but goodness, it was always just so many new people hogging up real estate and I just wanted to know where Louis was or what Armand and Daniel were up to. Some side adventures are great, like Blackwood Farm, but not every book needed to be 70% new cast stuff when you have an awesome core cast with issues out the wazoo they could be tackling both interpersonally and otherwise. And I especially wish we'd gotten Daniel's POV in the last books, because that dude had to have things to say about court and the freaking aliens!! Like Anne please.

But it's true, gotta be careful what you wish for. Honestly in every book that came out after Blood Canticle, I was just terrified she was going to kill Daniel off, or kill off Armand again, or both, or who even knows. So maybe it's better that she focused her energy elsewhere and we got some happy endings with our favorite pairings.

Oh, I wanted something about Daniel's madness from his own POV. But again, I guess that's what fic is for.

[not-neverland06]

Could you write Yandere Karl Heisenberg headcanons? 👉👈

Karl Heisenberg & GN!reader A/N: This is my interpretation of Yandere. Which in and of itself is already dark, toxic, and not healthy. So, prepare yourself for something that’s not going to make you feel warm and fluffy inside 👍 (Thanks for the ask, love) CW: This is DARK, proceed with caution. Body horror, possessive behaviors, mention of abuse, toxic “relationship” dynamic, suicide, death In no way am I romanticizing this type of behavior, or condoning it. I’m just being realistic on how someone like him would be with this twisted sort of mindset, personally, I would never take this level of disrespect, I recommend you don’t either. DDDNE

Proper characterization is important to me, let me know if you think I got anything wrong, I welcome criticism ♥️

Karl Heisenberg Yandere HC’s:

First of all, with normal Karl, you’re going to need a lot of patience and compassion to deal with his grungy ass

With Yandere Karl, may the father, son, and the Holy Spirit save you because you’re effed up the wazoo

You could meet him a few different ways, but the most likely is you’re a villager. You’d probably been on your way to pay homage to the Lady Dimitrescu, and he’d just so happened to be heading to the Duke at the same time. 

Talk about bad luck. 

You think he’s charming, in a gruff sort of way. 

He’s blunt with his words in a way you can appreciate. You tire of having to filter yourself because of the way you are demanded to act in the village. He provides an outlet where you can finally be unfiltered. Unfortunately, you don’t seem to notice how much he loves you talking shit with him. 

He’s so used to the people in the village running from him or being meek and timid around him. It pisses him off and does nothing to excite him. 

You, however, are very very intriguing to him.

You’ve got a fiery spirit, he’d love to known how far he can push you before you ignite or extinguish.

You grow to like him, maybe even a little infatuated, and you think the other villagers were being unnecessarily cruel. 

You don’t realize they had good reasons for hiding their young and locking their doors when he’d deign to come down from his factory. 

You catch subtle quirks in his behavior. 

Growing a little tense or being abruptly rude to someone if you were talking to them instead of him. 

Doesn’t matter if they were a child or an elder, they’ll walk away crying once he’s done. 

And you want to admonish him, really, you do. But he has this strange look in his eyes that makes your tongue feel like dead weight in your mouth. Your jaw snaps shut and he’ll give you a tight smile before grabbing you by the wrist and dragging you off somwhere. 

Maybe you start to distance yourself from him. Finally start to notice the way no one in the village will even look at you anymore. How everyone sends a prayer to the Mother when you pass by, like an omen of death. 

Too. Fucking. Late. 

He’s locked on you, you’ve peaked his interest. And he’s had such little entertainment, he’s been so bored for so long. 

He’s helping you, anyway. He’ll tell you as he straps a cuff around your ankle. No one in the village would ever want you. You’d be a pariah for the rest of your life. You need him. 

His main goal in life is to overthrow Miranda

Nothing, I mean nothing gets between that. If you were to try and intervene you’d be severely punished, possibly even killed. Doling out death like that isn’t foreign to him. Look at what he does to the villagers of the town when he’s making his soldats. 

The effects of your death would only sink after the choice was made:

“Hey, buttercup!” Karl glanced up from his newest invention and frowned. By now you’d figured out to come the first time he called. He should already hear your footsteps trailing across the metal. “Kid!” He glanced over his shoulder, irritation brewing in his gut. His fists clenched, the tools in his hand bending slightly as he slammed them against his desk. You had about five fucking seconds before he got the chair back out for you. He was sure you would hate being strapped to that, again. 

He felt more disappointment than anything. He really thought you guys had gotten to a better place. One where you understood where your place in the world was. At his feet, obedient and willing. 

He went ahead and dragged the chair out of the closet, dusting flakes of blood off the arms and undoing the leather straps. He was sure the sight of it would be enough to whip you back into shape, but he had a lot more fun being hands on. “Now!” He shouted, voice echoing throughout the factory, and, still, you didn’t come. He didn’t worry anymore about you trying to leave, lycans and chains stopped that from happening. He wondered where you found the audacity to try and be even a little bit rebellious. 

Maybe it was the bottle of whiskey he downed last night. Or the fact that he hadn’t gotten any sleep for the last four nights that made him forget what happened only a few days ago. How you’d argued with him against pursuing Miranda. Stupidly tried to convince him to just leave the village with you, leave it all behind and be happy somewhere else. 

He’d been blinded by rage. So goddamn furious that you wouldn’t just shut the fuck up and listen to what he was trying to tell you. That no matter what, without Miranda dead, he would never be free. He’d lashed out with his powers, he’d only meant to send the gears on his desk flying at you. Rattle you up a bit. He’d completely forgotten about the metal collar strapped around your neck. 

Heisenberg reached out, powers trailing up the stairs and latching onto the familiar shape and feel of your collar. There was a loud thud as your body slipped from the bed and he frowned at the noise. Were you still asleep? He glanced at the chair, maybe he should give you a break. But… He wanted to have some fun, needed a release. He wouldn’t be too harsh on you this time. 

Slowly, you thud, thud, thudded  your way down the stairs. Heisenberg pulled and heard something like cloth dragging on concrete as you rounded the corner. His eyes widened and he felt the cold grip of realization latch onto him. Your body lay motionless on the ground. Hands curled up in rigid claws, eyes flattened and grey. Your skin was a completely different shade, no color at all left in your lips. Your skull was still split from where you’d slammed into the wall when he’d accidentally sent you flying. 

He’d just forgotten about it.

Assumed it was a nightmare and moved on. 

He sank down in his chair and stared unseeing at your corpse. 

You’d be buried, a spot Karl would always be able to see from his workstation. Your death would somehow be blamed on Miranda and you’d just be more motivation for his suicide mission. I’d like to say he would be negatively affected by it. But he’s good at compartmentalizing, a few days of mourning, and then he’d be back to his mission. Your name a distant memory always tickling the back of his skull. 

I imagine there’s a lot of underlying issues revolving around bodily autonomy given how Miranda took it away from him when he was infected with the cadou. And given how, sadly, more often than not, the victim perpetuates the cycle, that would be projected on you. 

If he managed enough self control around you not to kill you while he’s throwing a temper tantrum, you can bet your ass he’s keeping you alive longer than you want to be. 

In his mind, he’s been screwed and fucked over so often, that he’s not letting you hurt him too. He takes it as a personal offense that you age and get sick, because he doesn’t. Cadou took care of that. He’s got a long miserable life ahead of him. 

Well, congratulations! So do you!

You’ll wake up one morning, a strange feeling in your arm and feel disoriented:

You try to say his name, but your tongue is fuzzy and you can’t seem to string together a coherent thought. 

You blink slowly, vision fuzzing in and out of focus. “Hey,” you vaguely recognize his voice as he walks towards you. His hands are gentle, suspiciously so, as he cradles you. Slowly, like he’s afraid to hurt you, he props you up. You’re distantly bothered by the fact that you can’t really feel your right arm very well. 

But Karl rarely ever treats you so gently, so you’ll soak it up as much as you can now. Your head lolls slightly to the left and you give him  a groggy smile. Whatever he dosed you with was slowly losing its grasp on your consciousness and you could start to feel yourself becoming more cognizant. 

“Hungry?”

You shook your head, stomach turning as you smacked your lips. Your mouth felt like he’d vacuumed the moisture out of it. He chuckled, the kind sound rushing over you like a warm blanket. He disappeared for a moment before reappearing with a cup in his hands. You tilted your head back as he dribbled the water between your parted lips. 

He leaned forward and pressed chapped lips against your forehead and it’s only then that you started to feel uncomfortable. Why was he being so nice? What the fuck did he do to you while you were passed out? 

You could feel the telltale signs of a panic attack, the drugs doing little to subdue it now. Karl picked up on your rapid breathing, the way your pulse jumped under the loose hand he had around your neck. It’s only then you noticed the lack of collar. You reached up, hands feeling foreign against that patch of skin.

His head dropped and he landed a kiss against your lips this time. “Had to take it off, was getting in the way. Don’t worry, buttercup. You’ll like the upgrade.”

Tears streaked down your cheeks as your hands slid across your clavicle, the cold feeling of metal greeting you where skin was meant to be. You couldn’t help but sob when you traced the spot your arm used to be. A metal replacement in its spot instead. 

“And, had to fix that knee of yours up too. Don’t worry, no more popping.” He laughed, like it was all one big joke, and ripped the blanket off of you. If you hadn’t already let your mind slip away from reality, from the situation, you would have screamed when he showed you the metal limbs where warm flesh and bone should have been. 

You nearly threw up when you saw the cruel line of cauterization and blood where he’d fused metal and skin.

He’s quick to get pissed off and touchy about anything he’s passionate about

I don’t recommend criticizing anything to do with his plans on Mother Miranda, regardless of how much he cares for you, he will lash out. He’s cunning and extremely intelligent, he knows how to strike where it hurts. 

Were this normal Karl, not one completely hyped up on the powers of the cadou, eventually he would find his own backwards way to apologize. A well timed compliment, a metal flower inspired by your favorite bloom, a trip to the Duke’s. 

Yandere Karl will never see the error of his ways. In his mind, everything he does for you, to you, is for your own good. No one else is going to take care of you like he can. He can’t ever risk you leaving him. He’s got it embedded in his brain that if he lets you out of the factory Miranda will find you and she will steal you from him. 

You’ve slowly become less of a human and more of a coveted toy the longer he has you. 

Imagine the little kid on the playground that takes his ball home so no one else can play anymore. 

That’s him (you’re the ball)

No one will remember you existed. 

If you were a tourist, your ID, your wallet, anything that can be used to identify you is found on a corpse that burned up in a “car wreck.” The body was burnt beyond recognition, it had to just be assumed it was you, it was your car after all. And no one had ever found you…

If you live in the village, your family, your friends, anyone who ever looked at you with a lick of interest is dead. He kills your family because he doesn’t think they properly took care of you. I mean, for fuck’s sake, he got his hands on you. What else did they let others get away with?

No. No one who disregarded his “love” like that gets to live. 

The others are self explanatory. He’s possessive beyond a fault. Even normal, he doesn’t do sharing. No one else gets to enjoy the bright light of your personality. 

It’s for him and him alone. 

And, no, he doesn’t notice when that light dims. He doesn’t notice the lights go out behind your eyes and the vacant look you carry half the time. He just thinks you finally got used to your life here. 

There’s no reasoning with him. No trying to explain how you’re drowning in despair and one more goddamn minute in these shackles is going to make you end it all. 

You love being with him. You need him. Without him you would be dead in a ditch somewhere. 

We all know, without him, you’d be living your best damn life. 

But he doesn’t. 

He thinks, despite the torture and the training, you are happy. You’re safe. He’s providing for you, and showing you just how the world can be so you know that he’s the only one who will ever love you. Who else is going to put up with you?

Everyone comes to a breaking point, when you get to yours, you need to either be fast or the next weeks of your life are going to be the worst you’ve ever head. 

You successfully get away with a quick slit of a razor, or a noose made of bed sheets, congratulations (not). 

You don’t…

At first he doesn’t even know what to do. 

No one, fucking no one gets to take you away from him. 

Not even you.

It takes a few days to plan something, and the anticipation alone is enough to break you. He’s clever, cunning, and worst of all, really fucking creative. Your mind can’t even conjure up whatever horror he’s got planned for you. 

To your surprise, it’s not anything physical. 

He’s your only source of human contact, despite everything at this point you do need him to remain marginally sane. He knows that, he uses that.

You’re locked in a room, food given to you without a schedule so you lose track of time.

No windows, a leaky drip coming intermittently from the ceiling. He doesn’t speak, you just hear the scrape of metal and dart forward to scarf down your meal. A tasteless gruel that doesn’t do anything but sustain you. 

If Heisenberg hadn’t “updated” you, the drafty air and mildew would probably have finished you off a week ago. 

As it is, you can’t get sick anymore, you just lay there in your own filth and the filth that was there before you. 

Your mind slips and you’re practically feral by the time he lets you out. 

He’ll remold your thoughts, your brain, how you think, around him. Protect you from yourself, he says. 

No one gets to hurt you, not even you. 

It’s ironic how he’ll never realize the only person whose ever hurt you has been him. 

He’s not the type to hurt those who hurt you and keep you safely locked away in an ivory tower all warm and cozy.

He’ll break you and keep going, long past your shattering point. He keeps bending, twisting, and breaking you down until you’re nothing but dust under his boot and a barely there echo of who you used to be. 

end. — I do not own the characters or the game Resident Evil Village, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.

[dichromaticdyke]

Hello, its me again. I am now off work and came to tell you another thought about Hey Mama's Toki. Ya'll were talking about possessive Toki. Love that. LOVE 💘 However, have we considered possessive Skwisgaar? 🤨 Imagine this. High Femme!Skiwsgaar is /that/ bitch, the IT girl. She's got suitors and groupies and fans out the wazoo and she KNOWS it! But, Toki, also has those same kinds of fans. Assuming that Skwisgaar is still the slut (affectionate) of the group, she's probably been with thousands of fans and either 1) stopped when she got with Toki or 2) Have some sort of open relationship to keep up with image or whatever (whatever floats your boat honestly). Toki knows this. Toki has known this. This is just facts of trade. HOWEVER, Skwisgaar on the other hand, will not tolerate fans oogling her girl any day of the week. I'm talking death glares, I'm talking possessive clinging, I'm talking sudden make outs in front of people, I'm talking cat fights, I'm talking attention seeking behavior to get Toki away from them and only to her. Toki hates sharing but Skwisgaar aint no better.

But the funny thing is, is that Toki only ever has eyes for Skwisgaar and has never once thought about entertaining any other woman. But she doesnt stop Skwisgaar because she likes the attention.

YES I AM EATING ALL OF THIS SO MUCH

again, my headcanon for skwisgaar in general with whichever partner you might pair him with is that he is definitely very clingy. he's so closet insecure and sensitive, can't handle any lack of attention from his partner, has MASSIVE ABANDONMENT ISSUES, terrified of everyone leaving him behind just like his dad, all his previous bands, Tyr...

wait this was supposed to be funny and sexy

ANYWAY BACK TO LIPSTICK LESBIAN SKWISGAAR

she's definitely still the unreformed mean girl. she'll flirt to get attention when she feels like she's not getting enough, and she'll also definitely throw drinks on anyone looking at toki. she's definitely also a) confused why people like toki because she's such a trainwreck, but also b) thinks of course everyone likes toki look at her she's the best girl in the whole world~

they're both sooooo toxic lmfao because they both deal with differing (yet similar) feelings of inadequacy but also jealousy or envy. it would be fixed by talking to each other, but they're also both turned on by the other acting possessive...so...